Seemless Universe

Art shows and fairs

2012-02-05T11:29:00.004-06:00

Got a couple shows coming up here.

Check this one out. Am showing a film in Palm Springs followed by a Q&A with the actor Daniel Stern. Looking forward to it.

Also been twisting up a bunch of small kinetic pieces and making leaps and bounds etc. here's a couple of pix although you need to see 'em move to get the full on effect.

Book cover art

2012-01-26T16:12:00.007-06:00

Was designing a book of my art to be printed and here were some of the covers i was thinking of using.

I went with Plains.

a Twiggy Xmas?

2011-12-04T10:46:00.002-06:00

This one just went off to the gallery - the owners are making a 60's Christmas themed window so this was by special request.

long time no blog.

2011-11-29T17:25:00.002-06:00

trying a new stencil here. 3 layers. here's some tests. unhappy with 'em but . . .can anyone even tell me who this is suppose to be?

Today's Scores

2011-08-07T20:40:00.012-05:00

Cubs 4

Pirates 0

Philadelphia 3

Juarez 8

Roe 7
Wade 2

storage space 2
time zones 7

transitory verbs 8
stationary bicycles 1

Big Ben 7
Little John 6

What Passes These Days 2
The Change of Winds 5

the seemingly vague 8
trace amounts of shame 4

poetry, but not in the usual sense 2
Noxzema 5

long division 1
short shorts 7

discussions not involving the advantages
of three legged furniture 5
discussions involving the advantages
of three legged furniture 9

South Wacker 7
Downers Grove 3

Crazy Guggenheim Museum 5
Mixed Metaphor Building 4

being careful of what you wish for 3
getting what you wish for, kinda 1

Lou Gehrig’s Disease 4
Tommy John Surgery 7

bland vanilla percussions 6
small mouth bass 8

googling your 4th grade girlfriend 2
skinnydipping with your wife 5

banality 3
Jack Parr 9

a farcical tangle of events 6
the list of people who have played Bingo and lost 3

Never Never Land 6
permanent interim 5

before the invention of barbed wire 5
three potatoes ago 2

rollercoasters 7
drive thru McDonalds 1

crash cymbals 11
status symbols 0

broke & homeless 3
Standard & Poor’s 9

bunny ears 11
old jews 4

when all else fails 2
your mind’s umbrella 2

being celebrated by strangers 8
cleaning your toilet the next day 3

brown 1
magenta 7

rum and coke 6
milk of magnesia 2

Earth Inc.

2011-07-21T19:22:00.003-05:00

lets just say . . .

2011-06-28T09:53:00.008-05:00

June 2011 has been astonishing.

here's some pix that have nothing to do with that but I'm just filling in because that seems like too short of a post.

(fyi: most of these i didn't take...only kinetic and mini dog i shot)

luna

meta graffiti

for you know who

about 3 lifetimes ago

kinetic close ups

how mythology has evolved

glasses and dogsitting

shadow of our moon

how the pros do it

cool

how do they do that? op art 2011

Recent Randomocity

2011-06-16T12:55:00.011-05:00

Humanity is hereditary.

guy on Antiques Roadshow brings in an old purse and some sorta fossil. by the end:

Silk Purse - $180.00

Sows Ear - $22,000

experimental film a person could make:

3 Frames of the Condor

spreading god like peanut butter mayonaise

cartoon toothache

write a story you

would never write.

She always carried the threat of style.

interestign.

crazy guy who sometimes when he's out with his friends he gets a little froggy and they have to put the elizabethian collar on him, like your sick dog wears. Only it's just a ruse to freak out strangers. the guy will be speaking quite eloquently one moment and the next he is growling and trying to get at something. something akin but not entirely to the guy who has a job down on the wharf - he sits in the drivers seat of his car with a full dog outfit on, the head sitting next to him in the front seat. He wears glasses and reads from War and Peace or The Brothers Karamozov, waiting for customers. The sign on his car reads "See The Crazy Dog". When the customer slides a dollar in the slot he sighs a big sigh (making a big show of being put out) puts a bookmark in his book, takes his glasses off and carefully places them in their case, puts his dog head on, checks himself in the mirror and then goes fucking nuts barking and jumping over the seats front to back trying to get at the customer. 30 seconds later he abruptly stops and goes through the same motions only now in reverse and goes back to his book.

he and her and their sexless fling.

guy explaining to another guy what god is.

He looks over us!

He made everything!

The guy is Amazed!! He's never heard about this man!

Double Feature: Deliverance & Cabin Boy

The

Bordering

The

Done

For

RATES OF HEALING

(In no particular order)

cut finger

broken heart

Mt. St. Helen

loss of loved one

heart surgery

your team lost

crack in the cosmic egg

rejection

bad haircut

The Jewish how ya doin' matrimonial sheet

a couple driving along Duluth on a gorgeous spring day...

HE: "This really is Beautiful here!"

SHE: "It's gotta be cold in the Winter."(Pause) "I wonder what the suicide rate is?"

Former and present Chicago athletes that are also sentences.

2011-05-14T15:21:00.005-05:00

Davey lopes.

Julius peppers.

Ernie banks.

Derrick rose.

(thanks to rick monaco for the ernie banks one)

2011-05-03T01:40:00.003-05:00

in the field of depth, this would be your shallow end

Match the Crime to the Face!

2011-04-06T16:50:00.012-05:00

One of the local Chicago papers publishes the mugshots of recent arrestees, which to me seems wrong on a few different levels. I mean c'mon . ..innocent before guilty and all...but here they are in the paper for all the world to see. This doesn't even seem legal to me but here it is. It's fucked up.

But That Doesn't Mean We Can't Have Fun With It!

Does it?

See if you can match the face with the crime!

Here are the crimes listed:

1. animal cruelty

2. battery

3. cannabis delivery

4. illegal possession of a motor vehicle

5. criminal sexual abuse

6. hit & run

7. felony intimidation of a public official

8. improper lane usage

and here are the 8 faces

answers below. don't cheat.

OK? OK.

How did you do? Let us know.

And P.S. the guy with the improper lane usage also had a DUI in there too. It's just that improper lane usage seemed funnier by itself.

Assumptions of the Young

2011-03-27T09:31:00.009-05:00

OK I must be getting old. There, I said it. How do I know this at 9:30 on a Sunday morning? Because I just read an article online about how to choose your companions for Coachella.

huh?

In fact Coachella is so well known and renowned that they don't even mention who or what or where IS Coachella. I must KNOW that already so the writer just gets to the point of who you should go there with. But that's not the thrust of this post.

In fact the article was entitled

How To Choose Your Coachella Posse

See? right there. I've shared my life with various wonderful people at every stage but never had a posse. It was "just" a bunch of folks I loved and loved hanging out with. In my life a posse was in fact a group of angry and vengeful townfolk in black and white westerns who would hurriedly saddle up and go after the bad guys. Usually with one guy left behind who had some moral hesitations about the level of retribution his unwashed neighbors were showing toward the now track making miscreants. But I digress.

Anyway, I bit and googled Coachella. Of course it's a music festival. Taking place in Indio, California. (FYI: Countdown: 19 days)

I'm guessing Indio, California has had it's share of posse stories from back in the old west. It being a desert town resting between LA and the Arizona border. This I didn't need to google as I spent one night there many years ago. It wasn't the location I and my friends had planned on staying but a brokedown pickup truck made our decision for us. Our roadtrip started in Tempe, Arizona and was heading toward Los Angeles. Or was it the beach towns just below? I forget. This trip was fueled by all sorts of things not the least of which was half cocked youth. (This confirmed by the fact our vehicle of choice for the journey made it 2/3rds of the way to it's destination.) And when i say we were in the center of the desert I do mean it quite literally. When I asked the tow truck driver what town we were in he said quite deapan, "Desert Center". Yes there is a town called Desert Center and we found it.

Now remember this is 30 years ago so facts are blurry. Was the truck fixed that night or ? did we have two vehicles with us? Were we hitchhiking? it's vague now. But somehow we got to the nearest town that had a motel. Indio. The six of us?? this number too is vague.

We sent one guy in to get a room. The conversation probably like this:

one guy: "yeah i'd like a room"

them: "how many of you?"

one guy: "just me. yeah got stuck out here all alone. car broke down. yep, just me"

them: "OK that'll be 20 dollars."

About ten minutes after we all snuck into the room very surreptitiously, the knock on the door came. The motelkeeps were none too pleased with our little economically based maneuver. They didn't want the likes of us around their livelihood. We tried with the best argument we could muster...something akin to "C'mon". In short, the gig was up. We got our money back but ended up all stretched or scrunched up in various uncomfortable positions in a pickup truck, trying to sleep while most of the acts at Coachella this year weren't born yet.

I guess I did have a posse. I just thought they were a bunch of guys i knew and hung out with all the time.

Here's a picture of four of us still with the belief we were gonna be in L.A. in 3 hours.

4 Courtney's

2011-03-13T14:06:00.004-05:00

Another commission . . .a friend saw some Courtney Love practice stencils and wanted 4 across. A quadtych? double diptych?

these photos don't do 'em justice, but you get the idea.

images for March

2011-03-05T11:38:00.006-06:00

random sampling of images for the first week of March

Go ahead . . google "campground maps"

i did.

stencil studio floor grid

messy stack o' stenc's

very recent stencil for hire. test shown here.

(at 51, Miller realizes the concept of commerce.)

freshly sprayed courtney love t-shirt

for sale on etsy!

future stencils maybe ?

don maynard? why not?!

if you can name the following three, you're at the right blog!

Latest shirt

2011-02-28T10:02:00.003-06:00

Who The Hell Is Tom Myers and Why is Hollywood Anti-Quaker?

2011-01-25T13:57:00.021-06:00

Funny you should ask on the day the Academy Award nominations come out.
Tommy Myers. Oscar nominee. 3rd year running. (3rd times a charm? right, tom? )
So yeah, Sound. They give awards for that? I mean . . .They give awards for that!
3 years ago tmyers was nominated for Wall-e. sound design/mixing and/or editing, i forget. Something to do with sound. He lost out to s#$%dog millionaire, but has a great story RE: Peter Fonda and a large potted plant in a Hotel lobby late that night. So all was not lost.
Last year he’s nominated for “Up”. CUT TO March 7, 2010: “And the Winner for Sound Editing is . . .The Hurt Locker”
Mother Fuckers!!!!!
Can’t a guy from Philadelphia get his??!!
I’ll tell you Hollywoods dirty little secret: Anti-Quakerism. There. I said it. They KNOW if a Quaker loses there’s not going to be any trouble. They’ll just go about their business, maybe make a sandwich and say something nice about the winner.
So this year TMyers is up for sound editing on ToyStory3. Congratulations Tom!
We’ll all find out on February 27th if Hollywood finally comes out of the stone ages to recognize their Quaker brethren.

Here we see our hero in action

You like me!

Here we see Myers with 3 other guys not holding Academy Awards.

more action photos!

All work and no play makes a man . . ..something, i forget. . . . .

Contemplating his next throw . . .He Likes the sound it makes!

(Notice the thick ankles )

I'm not saying he's a whore . . .but . . . . .

more people posing without Oscars . . . .

but a damn good looking group! (and a rare shot of our hero

looking semi exuberant while trying to cop a feel)

a young Tom Myers predicts how many Oscars he will win. (either that, or what place the Giants were in that day.)

fReaK

2011-01-11T17:28:00.002-06:00

old self portraits reMix

2010-12-28T13:15:00.005-06:00

this old thing..not me! the pictures.

the story goes . .a most beautiful, inexplicable and mysterious woman gifted me a polaroid camera for my birthday so on the hungover morning after.... the first shot my eyes like slits. damn.

so for this second one i decided to open my eyes As WIDE AS POSSIBLE. sheesh. that's as far as they would go.

OK i got sprocketholes to spraypaint.

P.S. Happy Birthday Phil.

Plaster Your Face

2010-12-16T15:17:00.006-06:00

Yowza! It's been awhile.

I found a very interesting website yesterday.

http://photofunia.com/

It's so damn easy to do this I feel like I'm cheating.

2010-11-04T12:36:00.002-05:00

NYC, etc.

2010-10-10T17:30:00.002-05:00

Been a long time here with no bloglines. Was busy working on big kinetic sculpture, getting ready for my screening in NY and trying to figure out why my computer just up and said "fuckit".

and fuckit it did.

since then . .

I'm on a new laptop, have made my largest sculpture to date (bigger is better, size matters, etc etc.) and got my name in the NY Times.

the screening in Brooklyn was a gas, got to see a bunch of old friends, meet some new future old friends, played pool and skeeball at the local haunt afterwards and generally kicked it in Williamsburg. You shoulda been there.

relaxing on Rick Monaco's roof the night before the screening. (Rick makes a kickass grilled rooftop newport steak..i think it has alot to do with sauce and searing the shit out of the fat early and often. Rick ain't no passive griller - he's tossing and turning the steak from start to finish. )

Mark Street, I and some other off camera folks hang out before the screening at Union Docs in Brooklyn. (Notice the great patio they have out back of the theater and a perfect night to be out in it)

(L to R. Steve Holmgren, Katherin McInnis, Mark Street, Miller)

I always find that post screening discussion works better in black and white.

Two ex Monaco Lab employees telling stories of sprocketholes past.

I think Mark's heard this one before.

Did I answer the question?

the staff at Union Docs were/are amazing. Very laid back and professional at the same time. A wonderful night all the way around. Thanks Steve for this very cool opportunity.

And if anyone who was at the screening is reading this - i STILL think The Bony Orbit is funny. Even with all that awkward silence. So there.

stuff coming up

2010-09-08T15:50:00.005-05:00

Hey my computer has been down for about a month now so there's my excuse. OK? OK. I'm blogging from the public library ferchrisakes.
I have some shows coming up and here's the link for one of em. if you're in New York come by for a fun night of Coleman Miller shorts. I'll be there answering all your film and non film related questions. There will be prizes as well. And surprises.
More locally here in Elgin we're having a big ass art show this weekend. (sept. 10, 11).
check it out. my largest sculpture to date will be there too.

miscellaneous images

2010-07-13T13:55:00.013-05:00

Dinner with good friends is always a nice thing

(left to right -Yuri, Rick, me, Andrea. PHOTO BY NICK NICHOLS)

Exploring at the rock quarry ain't bad either. Especially after dropping the camera that took this shot out of my many pocketed shorts and driving back to the place an hour and a half later to see it sitting at the base of a pile I had earlier climbed up on looking for the best rocks. Still in working condition. Amazing it hadn't been run over by one of the many trucks pulling in and out of there.

going to a Cubs/Sox game with folks half my age. (fyi : Cubs win)

(Left to right - Matt, Rob, Tim, Jocelyn)

Young Neil Armstrong

old simple sculpture

some guy

Storms over the Fox Valley

2010-06-19T12:33:00.004-05:00

Yesterday it came down in sheets for awhile. My boss and I had dropped some stuff off at Goodwill when the clouds started coming in. I took a few shots from the parking lot out back. 2 minutes later the pouring rain was hitting the truck in buckets so we sat in there and shared a cigarette. We weren't going anywhere with the wind and our trailer so we spent a half hour in the Goodwill. A dozen children's book, a lamp, and a big ass movie screen later we were on our way.

is this photo out of or soft? focuswise.

2010-06-16T12:45:00.004-05:00

OK my boss is certainly no Ansel Adams. And for those who know me . . .This Is Not my living space. Taken at the recycling spot in St. Charles. 1140 pounds of mixed paper we dropped there. Thought we might have a ton. I think we did. just not literally.

random backyard balancings

2010-06-10T11:17:00.002-05:00

my digital still camera also takes video.

25 Reasons Why Or Why Not Or Just Because of

2010-06-06T16:53:00.005-05:00

Nightcrawlers ate my homework.

God stopped me at the corner of Slade and Augusta and asked me directions to the nearest napkin.

That dang noun verbed all over my adjectives again!

Salamanders with heads the size of refrigerators cannonballed into Carl Sagan’s meatball flotilla, I swear.

Was over at Holster’s occasionally getting a word in edgewise.

Vague and peculiar skywriting left the entire county in a perplexed frame of bodymind.

The ice cream monsters kidnapped Phil’s seven iron.

The whore gods made me do things.

After watching a special on magic the night before, I spent the entire day in line at city hall to change my name to The Magnificent Splendido.

My cable went on.

A naked (but not without his charms) straggler needed directions to the furthest train station.

Wisconsin blabbermouths vandalized Herbie’s Erhlacher Jersey.

LifeGrenades went off in my head area.

Was up all night writing sentences with little or no correlation to the subject at hand.

Three words: World Menstruation Day.

Freshly graduated High School students cared little for my explanation regarding light waves and shade.

The bigger they are the harder they can hit you.

Had to mop the projection booth after Weird Stanley’s thought balloons exploded all over my 16mm print of Thermometers: How They Help Us.

Fermilab’s discovery of the Good Riddance molecule took up all my bandwidth.

Sarah’s postcard told me things I didn’t need to know, although she apparently still wishes I was there.

Was busy wandering the attics of my neighbor’s mind.

Before they let me go with a warning, I had to explain to the cops why there was a dead White Sox fan in my trunk.

Never mix hemoglobin and riboflavin!

Had to explain to me 84 year old father that taking down the storm windows and putting up the screens does not take as much planning or anxiety as the invasion at Normandy.

Was up all night with a sick davenport.

itchy panorama graduation

2010-06-05T10:17:00.007-05:00

so i'm waiting just west of Elgin for the boss to show up at the farm decide to try some shots with the digital camera. there's the panorama function let's you take three separate shots and the camera melds them together for ya on the spot. not bad. you can sort of see the seam but oh well I'm not shooting for Vanity Fair.
on the downside some poison ivy found me before I found it this week not bad but enough to get me to Walgreens where I found a product called Itch-X (just down the aisle from another product called Boil-Eaze.)
Today I am off to another high school graduation party (the second in as many weeks) to celebrate 12 years of knowledge gaining with yet another kid I have known since they were shortly out of the womb.
Time Marches On.

Sentences In The News!

2010-05-26T10:37:00.003-05:00

So the New York Times has a front page article about a rash of suicides at a Chinese electronics firm. The owner, one of the richest people in Asia had this to say
“We are reviewing everything,”
But here's my favorite line from the article.
. . . The company, he said, is reviewing labor practices, hiring psychiatrists and putting up safety nets on the buildings.

How do people live like that?

2010-05-23T22:36:00.005-05:00

I found this clip online from the 2002 documentary "Comedian". Not a bad film. Not great. But this one scene floored me. In it, Jerry Seinfeld is talking with a younger comedian backstage about show business. The guy is complaining about his lack of any kind of "normalcy" in his life and how he thinks he wants a wife, a kid, a house, etc. Seinfeld relates a Hollywood story that summed up how I feel but could never quite put into words.
This story could not have expressed it any better.
The sad part for me is, the younger comedian just doesn't seem to get it. Maybe he does, I don't know. It certainly doesn't take away from the impact it had on me. I LOVE This Story.

Some days are just way better

2010-05-19T21:11:00.005-05:00

sitting here listening to the original release of Exile on Main St. it holds up good today being the re release date and all but today with or without the stones was beautiful hauling plants and dirt around in the Ford with the big ass trailer and actually backing the thing up and turning around a couple times don't sound like a big deal but try it once or twice it's an acquired taste ya gotta think all backwards or sideways or something and digging the sun on my face and even the scratches all over my dirty hands shovels, wheelbarrows, dirt, back roads full of farms and other trucks all hauling their shit for the masses midday finding myself at my friends house for more dirt hauling his young daughter making lunch for us and talking with the painter there about Elgin politics and art and fire departments and rich patrons he may or may not know whereas Dylan the tiny tiny dog of said daughter sure wags his tail a lot! an early day so stopped off in Geneva that most she-she-ist of towns where i sold a sculpture this weekend thanks to my boss and her garden show (Thanks D) and left some work there for the owner of a shop you know the type all precious and cute and adorable stuff for the mommies this owner was short shrift wanting to give my stuff away thanks but no thanks and i had a coffee and a smoke on the street running into that adorable couple with the wine sharing laughs the three of us in the sun on the corner there.

SoundUnseen Duluth

2010-05-13T15:09:00.006-05:00

I did a quick trailer for my friend Rick who is the Fest director for SoundUnseen Duluth.
check it out below. (or see a much better quality version here.)

and here's the fest site.
June 2-6 in Duluth.

Happy Mother's Day!

2010-05-09T10:41:00.005-05:00

Happy Mother's Day Mom wherever you are!
The wonderful thing about Mom's (and Dad's) is you can tell them "Thanks for Everything!" And mean it LITERALLY. How Cool is THAT?!
My mom used to love it when I'd tell her that.

I love you Mom.

Are they married yet? around 1949.

Mom and wallpaper.

Even Mom's were teenagers

Mom and my college sweetheart, Jami Sue. On our way to a wedding....(Steve L. and Kelly?)

me trying to look like a very serious college student.

Kentucky Derby 2010

2010-05-03T11:46:00.025-05:00

If you can't have fun at the Kentucky Derby then there's something wrong with you and you should have that looked at. I'm just saying. Even with the rain (and probably because of it for some of these folks) that kept up at a steady drizzle until 20 minutes before post time for the Big Race. It's impossible to not be entertained by everything that's on display in front of you. Sure it helps to go there in the company of ten friends (many of whom you've known since the '60's). And yes a good mixture of Budwieser, Bloody Mary's and Mint Juleps is always called for. I mean really . . .why not?

Here's 7 out of 11 hangin out on the paddock just moments after arriving. First Juleps of the Day.
(left to right; Tom Hollis, Phil Johnson, Todd Farwell, Todd Daniels, Peter Daniels, Bob Nelson, Ross Daniels.)

Half an hour before post time of The Race and the sun comes out. Perfect timing.

Todd Phil and Joe all happy as pigs in mud
at our great spot we found a half hour before The Race.
(NOTE: if you look closely in the background you can see
rich people on the balcony looking down on us.
Literally & figuratively)

Here Todd D and Phil discuss the next race while
Jeff W (middle) contemplates ways to get under
Todd's skin.

Joe is not afraid to show you how
he feels without saying a word.

Here we see Joe, Phil & myself considering our next wager. After all our options were weighed I bet $7 on Budweiser and they both bet $10 on Mint Juleps.

Jeff proclaims wisdom about whatever is happening here in the moment
while Ross (far right) looks on, bemused. Todd checks to see
if he has a winning ticket while secretly hoping for no immigration discussions around the fire tonight.

Here we are hanging out on the first turn waiting for the big one. Phil hiked us all over to this spot and halfway there he stopped to tell us if we couldn't get into this section he didn't want to be responsible for any missed race and have to hear about it for ten years. I told him he was Golden and could do no wrong, but we would still blame him for ten years. Luckilly we all got in OK and watched the race from a great spot on the first turn. (see short clip of race from this location at bottom)

Bring out a camera and 9 times out of 10 Todd will try and pose like a tough guy. The key word there, of course, is "try".

Ladies and roses and garbage bags.

Cuties in big hats EVERYWHERE.

When asked Can I take your picture? 99 out of 100 folks at the Derby answer in the affirmative. Friendliest damn place on the planet . . .Is it southern hospitality? Mint Juleps? The sight of so many tiny men on horses? who cares!! it works.

Another smiling couple enjoy Churchill Downs on a Saturday in May.

Snapping away on the infield . . .

And my favorite section in Churchill Downs....the Paddock.
Here you see it all: Southern Belles. Infielders on their way to the tunnel. Horses. Jockeys. Searsucker. Movers. Shakers. Down & Outers. Young inebriates. Old school southern gentlemen with accents like Foghorn Leghorn. Gawkers. and Hats. Did I mention the hats?

Many girls enjoy jumping in front
of your lens when you least expect it.

A well dressed gent cops a feel of his
well dressed Belle between races.

Every once in awhile a group of six to twelve or so really short guys in loud outfits would walk by and people would yell mostly positive things at them.

Then there are the Mudders. Groups of young inebriates sliding around in the mud on the infield.
One of the guys in our group (Peter) was (and still is) a young 24 year old. After 10 minutes on the infield he said to a couple of us . . ."I'd like to apologize in advance for my entire generation". great line and big laugh inducer... - but really no apology needed. 99.9% were smiling big goofy happy smiles and having the time of their lives.

My $5 on Super Saver paid $45. of course my $5 on Awesome Act, American Lion and Deans Kitten didn't pay shit but hey that put me $25 ahead on my wagers.
And yes it is down to a Science this wagering on horses. What you do is this:
Look down the list of the names of the horses and whichever one speaks to a part of your life in any way is the horse that will win. I've done alot of my shopping at Savers and so this one was a no brainer. Like I said . . .Science.

Here's about 1/6th of the race right at the first and second turns. Not a bad view for paying general admission. Notice the young guys near the end of the shot who aren't even watching the race after the horses pass by in front of them. The F@#!ing Kentucky Derby is going on right in front of them but they're talking about some other shit. sheesh.

All in all a great day with great friends in Louisville, Kentucky.

And Sara in B-Town if you're reading this, your dream hasn't come true yet!
Nyah nyah!

Street Stencils from Argentina

2010-04-26T00:44:00.012-05:00

I've been into making stencils lately and recently found this site of Argentine street art

here's some that blew me away or were just inspiring in some way

Deirdre Makes Faces.

2010-04-14T09:28:00.003-05:00

I saw my good friend Deirdre while I was up in Minneapolis last week. Rest assured if you bring out a camera she WILL make faces. (and she will correct you if you misspell her name)

MLB: Characters of the Game

2010-03-31T10:22:00.003-05:00

Baseball season is just a few days away. The game doesn’t hold me as it once did, growing up and playing at every opportunity. It used to be that I'd go to a newspaper's Sports section first, but that was a long time ago - a lifetime, really. I tired of reading about salary caps, trade deadlines and even designated hitters. This said, one particular player has kept some spark of my old interest in the game alive : San Francisco's young pitcher Tim Lincecum.

A few years back while in a hotel room flipping channels, I saw this kid throw one pitch and was immediately taken. His delivery was unlike anything I'd ever seen .. a stride that defied physics. In the two years since he's logged up two Cy Young Awards and a pot bust, and I'm a big fan. In truth, it wouldn't have taken much more than that first pitch. This long-haired, flame-throwing Freak (not just my word, but the nickname bestowed upon him by teammates) is something to watch. I'll leave it at that.

Back to baseball. Lincecum certainly isn't the only character to grace the game over the years. Being a Cubs fan ( a trait I inherited as did 99% of the population - by virtue of being my father's son), I have a soft spot in my heart for the likes of Joe Pepitone, Jose Cardenal, and "Wild Thing" Mitch Williams. But my fondness is not limited to former Cubs, and I also think back on Bill "Spaceman" Lee, Mark "Bird" Fidrych and Bo Belinskly (who pitched a no hitter in his fourth start for the '62 Angels and was soon up to his knuckles in Hollywood starlets.) Yogi Berra, John Kruk, Jim Bouton, Earl Weaver - these names all make me smile. I still have a video of Weaver, the Baltimore Manager, losing his shit after a first base umpire ruled against him. Watching this tape brings guaranteed laughs from me and anyone else in the room. The hapless ump ejects Earl and then watches as he retreats to the dugout at least a half-dozen times before spinning on his heel to march back out and deliver a few more choice words. Any fan of the game will tell you that the mere mention of certain names can bring back a flood of thoughts, emotion and memories.
White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen on the South Side is a character, as is the Cub's Lou on the North Side. (Though Lou's a bit more literate and therefore not quite as much fun.) For sheer spectacle though, Oz has the edge. A middle aged homophobic greaser pimp in a baseball uniform who will say anything is an indisputable entertainment value. Throw a twitterball into the mix and you got some good reading. That’s right .. Ozzie tweets. With this in mind let’s take a look into some of the all time best manager quotes over the years. Yogi Berra always merits first mention. "Baseball is ninety percent mental and the other half is physical" and "Nobody goes there anymore - it's too crowded" come to mind among many. But Ozzie is no slouch. And so, without further ado..

I call this game . . .

Ozzie quote or Not an Ozzie quote?

1. “Most ball games are lost, not won.”

2. “Good seasons start with good beginnings.”

3. “Going to get my chevy transverse dark blue grey interior nice wheels luck good for the summer”

4. “Win any way you can as long as you can get away with it.”

5. “Humanity is the keystone that holds nations and men together. When that collapses, the whole structure crumbles. This is as true of baseball teams as any other pursuit in life.”

6. “let's eat suchi now”

7. “The Yankees don't pay me to win every day, just two out of three.”

8. “Why I love this town so much very cool town very calm to bad is my last to game fort me hear for now lol”

9. “There is but one game and that game is baseball.”

10. “My fav you tube video is ced the entertainer on zab judah don't ever play with matchessss”

11. “People who live in the past generally are afraid to compete in the present. I've got my faults, but living in the past is not one of them. There's no future in it.”

12. “I want a corona polar presidente now please this trafic lord”

answers

1. Casey Stengel
2. Sparky Anderson
3. OZZIE!
4. Leo Durocher
5. Connie Mack
6. OZZIE!
7. Casey Stengel
8. OZZIE!
9. John McGraw
10. OZZIE
11. Sparky Anderson
12. OZZIE!

1940's picnic

2010-03-23T11:52:00.006-05:00

I found an old negative in a shoebox here and took it down to the local library. Printed out 8 X 10's of sections on a microfiche printer then stuck em together.

stencils stencils stencils

2010-03-21T17:04:00.002-05:00

here's a shot of the studio area with the stencils...bunch of self portraits, friends, thumbtacks, doilies, etc.

Digital camera

2010-03-18T18:45:00.005-05:00

My good friend Tom Myers sent me a camera today. One week he's at the Academy Awards (nominated for Best Sound Editing) the next he's sending me a digital camera. YowZa!!
This is the first test.

old photos #37

2010-03-16T17:51:00.003-05:00

Taken about one year ago in Soho as I waited for my Shwarma. A great day this was. Brooklyn Bridge, Chinatown, listening to music in Times Square subway station, etc., etc., etc..

(photographer: Sarah Stephens)

It's Frank's World, Ronnie. You Just Lived In It.

2010-03-13T10:23:00.005-06:00

Still one of my all time favorite photos.
Ronald looking pathetic, Nancy can't be bothered and Frank's having a ball with it.
Never has a pecking order been so visually demonstrated.

Two or three things to know about Malurus cyaneus

2010-03-10T00:48:00.004-06:00

The ship . . .it's. . .it's exploded!!

2010-02-23T17:18:00.007-06:00

Postal People

2010-02-20T13:16:00.004-06:00

I love the fact that the U.S. Postal Service put these 8 cent stamps out back in the day before postal people meant what it does now.

blobfish

2010-02-18T12:41:00.004-06:00

believe it or not this guy has 380 friends on Fishbook.

Play CELEBRITY PARENTS!!!

2010-02-15T16:16:00.005-06:00

Who did these two bring into the world??

The winner gets a prize of my choosing, probably.

watch out

2010-02-15T00:38:00.001-06:00

RentAPortableToiletOnline@centralvendor.com

2010-02-13T16:33:00.005-06:00

Just when i was getting used to emails with schemes from Nigerian bankers and Canadian pharmacies and the UK National Lottery Headquarters this ended up in my mailbox.

FROM: RentAPortableToiletOnline@centralvendor.com
TO: splurn@aol.com

SUBJECT: Find a portable toilet online for your next event.

two evening darkness thing

2010-02-12T16:05:00.006-06:00

so what ya do is you put the first couple hundred words of the Bible and you mix 'em in with the first couple hundred words of Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas.

2010-02-12T01:12:00.006-06:00

duplex diptych

Earthquake in Illinois!

2010-02-10T13:04:00.003-06:00

Today's Scores

2010-01-01T12:49:00.004-06:00

Cubs 5
Mariners 2

Georgia Tech 3
Slim Pickens 8

Vanilla, vaguely 7
Rhymes with ouch 5

Your heart on your sleeve 5
Pigs in a blanket 9

Where all the ideas go that you
didn’t write down when you were high 7
Pittsburgh 2

Selling out 3
Buying a vowel 5

Dreaming about butterflies and waffles 6
Untitled art 2

Three blind mice 2
One horse towns 5

Thought police 1
Word balloons 4

Business school 1
Peyote 7

Flotsam 2
Jetsam 7

Starting guns 2
Endgame 3

history 3
The History Channel 6

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer 5
The Underpants Bomber 2

A.M. 7
P.M. 4

Lunar month 2
Freshman year 5

Religions we’ve come up with so far
that can be taken seriously 2
Your Tostitos Halftime Report 5

Charles Barkley’s backswing 4
Chalkboard fingernails 1

3 of the 5 senses 7
Don DeLillo 8

Grundies 2
Melvins 3

fast food 1
sloe gin 5

nosebleeds 4
The price of tea in Tampa 2

Gravity 7
Exact change 5

Prayer 2
Miracle Whip 3

Lunar tropic eyeball 4
Newsroom cupcake hammer 3

The ongoing Brittany Murphy death investigation 5
The guy we met at the Ten Cat last night 1

It's Santa Time!

2009-12-19T11:04:00.006-06:00

Awwww. Children Love Santa Claus!

Actually this is probably a good thing. They love the idea of Santa more than some fat stranger in loud clothes.
(and in the case of the fifth one down . . .well this Santa has had a bad day I believe. OR he's half in his santa bag if ya know what I mean)

Spiritual Miracles In a Dog's Ass

2009-12-09T11:30:00.005-06:00

Went to my first Atheist meetup group last night at a bar in the Loop.
Beforehand I stopped off for Free Tuesdays at the Museum of Contemporary Art which is about a three iron from the Hancock Building. It was snowing big flakes as i walked the eight blocks from the El stop. Got inspired at the MCA after seeing some Calder work and also a group show of a bunch of Italians. After the museum I felt the need to prove I was a tough guy and walked to the bar in the Loop (1.7 miles) instead of taking the El . At this point it was coming down pretty good and the wind along Michigan Avenue was whipping things up nicely. At one point, outside the Tribune building alongside the river, I actually had to stop and turn my back to the wind, just to take a break from it all for a moment. The Windy City. Sheesh.
Anyway, I met some good like minded folks at the bar and was shown a nice photo online I thought I'd share.

I'm THAT good

2009-11-20T13:15:00.003-06:00

I generally don't talk about how damn good i am but I just have to say . . . I've only been in town for three weeks and already I've gotten Oprah to leave town.

You're Welcome, Chicago.

http://www.wordle.net

2009-10-12T18:55:00.005-05:00

this is a fun site!

www.wordle.net

undeserving folks

2009-10-10T13:05:00.004-05:00

I took this photo many years ago in my hometown of Elgin, IL.
I think it sums up the church nicely, don't you?

Superstitious

2009-10-07T15:48:00.007-05:00

This morning I was looking through some old books and came across one I hadn't perused in quite awhile. Encyclopaedia of Superstitions. An old library book on British superstitions I picked up cheap a few years back .
Now I am not a superstitious person myself. Although I do have one superstition I have made up and it seems to work. It's a simple one. If I see a dog wearing one of those Elizabethan collar things, It's going to be a good day. However, if I see a SECOND dog wearing one it's going to be a bad day. Years ago while living in San Francisco I was having a great day and saw one of those collars on a pooch and it just took off from there. But back to the book. There's some pretty good ones in there...

It is unlucky to pare one's nails on a Friday.

A person born on Christmas Day will never be hanged.

Moss growing upon a human skull, if dried and powdered and taken as snuff, will cure the headache.

Bad luck will follow any fisherman who mentions the word rabbit.

For sore eyes bathe with rain water gathered on Ascension Day.

you get the idea. These are actually in the book! but they missed a few . . .

Prosperity comes to those who throw a pig over a fence on an overcast Wednesday.

To cure gout, pick the scab of a stranger wearing a hat .

Attending an amateur dance recital is bad luck.

If you see a midget eating link sausage you will get a promotion.

Rubbing the head of a Jew counterclockwise will cause neighboring villagers to go deaf.

To cure rickets punch a matador in the pancreas.

Rubbing your vagina during a theatrical play will give the lead actress mumps.

If you want an abundant harvest in the autumn throw a Texan in front of a bus in July.

A red headed hitchhiker is the sign of an early spring.

A clown in the rain is a sign your headmistress might be up for it.

Believing vague stories of past misfortunes and how they were remedied will make you superstitious. On a Friday.

If a priest gives you the wrong directions to the circus you'll die at sea.

Outer Space Fact # 37

2009-10-01T16:03:00.004-05:00

The thing about flying past a black hole
is ya gotta remember to go WAY around it.

frank's out today

2009-09-28T16:45:00.006-05:00

(click on Roman to enlarge)

So yesterday morning I see the Polanski headline on the NYTimes.com. But when I clicked on it there was no real story yet. Just these notes someone mistakenly published (between the Zurich and NY office of the times? maybe) I dunno.
I think if Frank was in the office then this probably wouldn't have gone out online. Somebody's got some explaining to do. Probably to Frank.
Now to the story . . .
Really?! Are we going after Polanski when he shows up at a film festival in Zurich? wtf? All sorts of theories but as the Times quoted today "the United States have strongly denied any link between Mr. Polanski’s arrest and recent high-level negotiations on providing the Internal Revenue Service with the Swiss account details of suspected American tax evaders."
When the U.S. strongly denies anything, that's probably as good a place to start as any.

A Biggish Purge

2009-09-15T12:12:00.014-05:00

It's good sometimes to take a piece (or pieces) of your past, put them into cardboard boxes and sell them to an aging hippie at a used record store. It sorta clears out the system. And in this technological age of iTunes and ePhones and O rings and Frankenberries it's quite easy to keep yourself musically happy without ever once changing a needle. That said I still have my turntable and I gave myself a limit of 60 albums I would keep. for instance these 7 . .

Here's 7 of the 280 I sold. . . .

now i wonder how many of you will write in the comment box things like "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SOLD YOUR WORKINGMANS DEAD!" or somesuch. And i say that's part of the beauty of the big purge.
OK who can guess how much money I got for approximately 275 LP's ? i ask you .. .
if anybody guesses correctly they win a special secret prize which will be delivered to their home via the U.S. Postal Service. maybe. ya never know with those guys.

t's ootball eason !

2009-09-02T12:47:00.006-05:00

In deference to this new photo at the top i might as well mention it's football season.

Living in Minnesota you can imagine what name pops up in conversation these days.
This is a name that one of my friends said if he hears one more time he's going on a shooting rampage. But he has a bit of an anger problem anyway and likes it like that.
The last time he threatened a rampage had something to do with someone knocking on his door or somesuch. I won't name names . .let's just call him Quinn.
where was I ?
oh yeah . . . .Brett Favre. (Take THAT Quinn ! all you folks in south mpls - lock your doors.)
Whatever, it's cute to see all the MN Vikings fans getting excited for another losing year for them. But ya know, this isn't really a football blog so I'll just say this ..
the photo at the top you may think is a guy stiff arming another guy on the football field. But in reality it's two guys that are just in to some weird shit. Their odd way of playing peek a boo. Maybe.
Or just old fashioned Hand Sniffers.

this 21st century

2009-08-24T18:04:00.007-05:00

When asked who their favorite photographer is, 78% of Americans said:
Ashton Kutcher. 87% of US citizens under the age of forty now have friends that they've never been in the same room with. 56% of those people have never heard a busy signal. 27% of the people on this blog right now are just pretending to read it. 48% of bloggers couldn't care less. 82% of this blog post was added after the fact. 32% of statements using percentages are completely false. 64.1% of the letters in this sentence are consonants. And 14% of you will count the letters in the previous sentence to see if that is correct. As it should be.

Sheesh . . just post SOMETHING!!

2009-08-12T14:21:00.024-05:00

yeah it's been way too long since i posted anything. Have been going through a lot of my stuff here - found an old journal this afternoon and here's some randomness from it . . .

What is the first known border?

if you ask someone what they did today and they start with
"I got up" .
When "i got up" counts as a thing you did today, you may not have seized it, daywise, as they say.

Are you more daywise or nightwise?

good questions for psychological test --start easy
Are you more cat or dog?
tree or sky?
by the end of the test. . . .
Are you more cerbellum mushroom or wingnut bus route?

Jesus comes back
as a Playboy bunny
named Christy.

Her turn-ons are
hot tubs and the rapture.

can there be an us without a them?

Character names taken from Illinois counties/cities -

Montgomery Chattsworth

Pearl Ogelthorpe

Wilder Kane

Grace Canyon

Emmett Shell

Wisconsin . . .

Gordon Covena

Daisy Hazelhurst

Gibson Leslie

Lula Newton

Lamar Funston

Avalon Babcock

Flovilla Americus

Arizona . . .

Somerton Winslow

Jerome Globe

Flagstaff Wilcox

Winkelman Bisbee

Be silly and dirty and fantastic and poetic and ferocious and childlike and animal and mineral and sweaty and glasses and poetic again and candles and extra credit points.

Questions Of The Future . . .
How many light years a gallon does that baby get?

Love - it's strong AND fragile.

Art/weatherman who predicts the artistic movements
coming through the tri state area . .
Scattered surrealism with a chance of fluxus overnight. . . .

"Remember last October we had that unseasonable Dada?
It rained cats and dogs. Literally."

" . . .the first big bacon show . . . ." *

*some guy on charlie rose

Joseph Campbell-ize the ending fer christsake!

planning spontaneity

Good name for a gated community . . .
Monetary Heights

Giving art the business

Today's Scores

2009-06-27T11:41:00.010-05:00

Cubs 4
Brewers 1

Phillies 7
William & Mary 3

Werner Klemperer 4
influenza 2

box seats 5
male urinary symptoms 2

German Shepherds 4
Chinese Checkers 1

girl scout cookies 6
the magic bullet 1

rush hour 1
meandering 9

your blog 2
my blog 3

waning moons 6
waxing nostalgic 2

hunting 3
wandering through the meat packing district 5

Tim Lincecum 5
Wild Thing 2

making something with your hands 8
twittering 1

safe 5
out 1

nasal spray 8
crime sprees 5

Oswald 2
what Flipper thought about between takes 4

dinner 4
supper 7

silent auctions 2
loud shirts 7

their mental capacity 2
your crazy bone 9

Facebook 1
books 14

quiet contemplation 7
Christianity 1

the Cub's chances 2
symbolism in The Brady Bunch 8

Jeff Beck 11
Jimmy Fallon 0

Why does my computer suck donkey dicks so much lately?

2009-06-02T13:42:00.017-05:00

and that's just kinda a rhetorical question.
But first off in keeping with the political correctness and niceness that is seemless universe i have to here now state publicly that I in no way have any disregard for donkey dicks in general. Hell, some of my best friends are donkey dicks. (CUT TO: my friends reading this line (right now!) and wondering if they are in fact, donkey dicks) (Of course I wasn't talking about YOU, [insert your name here]!).
What I'm saying is i have nothing against donkey dicks. really. Unless one is dating my daughter in which case I'd say something like, "I HAVE A DAUGHTER??!!" But then i would calm down and get down to the facts at hand which are: No daughter of mine is dating a donkey dick. And the second fact is: I sincerely and truly just wanted to write a post about how bad my computer is running these days and I keep getting sidetracked with donkey dick references. Damn!!! See??!! But the third fact is: once you go down the donkey dick reference road it is hard to get off. this is true. The fourth fact is my computer sucks donkey dicks lately.
and it's because of . .no not that.
It's because i Upgrayd'd.
mac 10.5.6 or somesuch shit. a month ago i upgraded (misnomer) to this operating system and now most of the good software i used works like shit. (SEE: donkeys dicks/ suck).
Here's some details
Photoshop won't even open. This is a software I use ALOT. But sadly if you don't keep upgrading along the way ultimately it just becomes obsolete. (much like my tv signal in the coming weeks but that's for another blog post - Look soon for the exciting post on watching tv with the new improved dtv converter box. No more annoying snow!! Now we just get even more annoying pixelly drop outs and freeze frames!! Perfect for watching an exciting French Open tennis match like the one last weekend)
anyway . . .where was I? Oh yeah, my computer sucks donkey . . .well.. you know whats.
Sooo . . . Photoshop is closed now.
Final Cut Pro doesn't like me capturing video any longer than 6 seconds in duration before it starts acting like a colicky baby and my sound recorder won't even communicate with my computer. So yeah.
It seems my only solution is to invent and then buy the new Apple iQuit and go make art with paper and scissors and glue and stuff.
And donkey dicks.

Don't cry!

2009-05-08T19:53:00.003-05:00

Here's a picture of your blogger trying to come up with something to write and hitting a wall. It's been that way of late. No apologies though.
In reality this was taken by my father moments after he put me on one of these springy rocking horses which i did not like so much. It's good to know he had the sense to snap this photo instead of consoling me.
Dads. Ya gotta love 'em.

Happy Easter

2009-04-12T18:42:00.003-05:00

Whatever that means to ya . . .

Back from Hawai'i (more or less)

2009-04-08T08:50:00.008-05:00

OK I'm trying my best to get back in the swing of life here in Minneapolis after a week of hanging on the island with great friends. But i have to admit 80 degree temps are more to my liking in March than what we got here. (33 at present.)
Below is a shot of my friend Tom i took with a cheap underwater camera I bought at Walgreens before the trip. There was a little cove at our resort where you could swim with sting rays 'n some other fish of color. Bright colors.

Damn turtles everywhere.

Best of the Seemless Universe (or so I think)

2009-04-06T16:27:00.010-05:00

Is This a Test?

Please answer to the best of your ability.

1. Which of the following best describes your feelings about this first question?

c a. Confusion
c b. Annoyance
c c. Laughter
c d. Scorn

2. When taking tests regarding things and stuff, do answers come easy to you?

c a. yes
c b. no

3. When answering the previous question, if there had been a third option, 'sometimes" would you have checked that instead?

c a. yes
c b. no
c c. sometimes

4. If you were a test, which of the following would you be?

c a. Drivers
c b. I.Q.
c c. Breathalyzer
c d. Rorschach

5. Looking back, would you say your life has been:

c a. easy
c b. difficult
c c. sometimes

6. What word or phrase would best describe this question?

c a. yes
c b. no
c c. only in an emergency
c d. is this some kind of a joke?

(if you answered "D", please go to question 6a.)

6A. If this is some kind of joke, who or what is the joke 'on' ?

c a. the status quo
c b. test taking in general
c c. yourself
c d. them

(if you answered "C", please go to question 6B)

6B Oh come on! We're just having fun here, OK?

c a. OK.
c b. not OK.

(If you answered "B", go to 6c, for chrissakes)

6C. What's your fucking problem?

c a. little or no sense of humor.
c b. questionable upbringing.
c c. Republican.
c d. just not that into this kind of stuff.

7. Would you say you are more of an answer or more of a question?

c a. answer.
c b. question.

8. Would your friends say you are more of a blueprint or a haiku?

c a. blueprint
c b. haiku.

9. If your life is a baseball game, what inning are you in?

c a. 1st
c b. 2nd
c c. 3rd
c d. 4th
c e. 5th
c f. 6th
c g. 7th
c h. 8th
c i. 9th
c j. extra innings
c k. one out in the bottom of the fifth, with the score tied. men on first and third and Derek Lee up.
c l. I'm more into football.

10. Would you rather have pizza or sex?

c a. pizza.
c b. sex.
c c. sometimes.
c d. I'm more into football.

11. Is this test almost over?

c a. yes

-------------------------------------

Todays Scores

Cubs 7
Pirates 3

Snoop Dog 8
Winston Churchill 5

Sandy Koufax 5
The Periodic Table 7

Joan Baez 3
anal thermometers 8

Kentucky Derby 7
Skywalker Ranch 9

Nikola Tesla 11
Thomas Edison's soiled diapers 1

papercuts 3
Doris Day 8

congruent angles 4
Rasputin 11

Jack Lemmon's performance in Good Neighbor Sam 11
Grateful Dead lyrics 13

good friends 7
everything else 1

Bedford-Stuyvesant 6
Electric Light Orchestra 2

Denmark 7
persistence of vision 5

facing death 8
indoor plumbing 6

Sigourney Weaver 5
cartoon penguins 3

why you're still reading this 7
George Clooney's worst day 4

the whole idea of it all 5
shade 9

The Rapture 11
Spaghettio's 2

puppies 12
vehicular manslaughter 3

Man Ray 20
trousers 11

Western Civilization 5
Handi Wipes 2

----------------------------------------------------

Church of the Holy Coincidence.

I haven’t written too much on my ideas on religion and god but it's about time to let 'em out. The planet's been hijacked by ignorance and mythology and there really is no end in sight.
The following are some random thoughts from the journals:

Like an old hound dog religion has treed us. It’s all in our heads. Take a look..the dog is old, lame and blind. Climb out of the tree, stand on your own two feet and go help some others get out of those trees. It’s a start.

We change with the time. Our spirituality is too important to disregard each generations ideas. It’s the humans that are alive now that can save us. Not our dead heroes in books. It can happen in your lifetime. This is something to pray for. But not to a god. Pray to everyone living. Put your faith in the human race.

Big Bang? More like a Cosmic Ejaculation..

If religion has taught us anything it is this:

Get 'em When They’re Young.

Church of the Holy Coincidence.
No Guilt.
No Sin.
No Father/Sky god judging us.
All the old bets are off.

This planets ignorance in regards to spiritual evolution is shameful. We may be the laughing stock of the universe.

It's time for churches to start keeping the books and pay up.
Our government gives em a free pass.
Church & State - Totally in bed together.
It's time for religion to stop sucking off the tit of society.

the thing i refuse to buy into (re: religions) is they make their gods so petty. not only do they give these gods very human characteristics, but the very worst of them. Vindictive. Egomaniacal. Petty. (Notice i said "not only do they give these gods.." who can argue- we humans were the ones who came up with this grand idea of gods and later "a" god) so yes, we give our gods their traits. Lets' not fool ourselves ladies and gentlemen - it's all us.
if there is a god i can safely say he/she/it has not communicated with us. Certainly not by giving us "his rules"

Getting "over" religion will take awhile (understatement) and will be a huge human hurdle. And a great day. The Huge Human Hurdle.

8 comments:

m. f. said...: I certainly don't want in any way to be as pedantic as old man moppin', but this thing about Churches getting a free ride from the government, well, yes, that is somewhat true. But religion actually has a lot in common with art in this country. That is, the tax code in the U.S. is no more favorable to religious institutions than it is to arts organizations. The photography center where you show your work sometimes and often go to see the work of your peers doesn't have to pay taxes in much the same way as your aunt Ethel's church. The film fests that have awarded you prizes for your fabulous film doesn't have to pay taxes, just like Tom Cruise's ultraswanky religious org. In this country, by constitutional decree, the government doesn't give direct funds to any one religious org, and it doesn't give much to arts orgs either. But it helps keep such things afloat by given them both the same advantages in the tax code.
I'm not a religious guy, but I think artists should be careful of demonizing religious orgs because they pretty much have the same deal. I personally believe it's a good thing that this country's government steps back and lets people practice what forms of creative worship--whether to God or the muses--without much interference. It'd suck if it were any other way--whether no support at all, or too much support (and so an expectation of control).; January 17, 2008 12:13 AM
Coleman Miller said...: mf,
Damn. i veer off from the goofy and nonsensical just once and this is what happens? You make good points and my response to these are below.
But first I have to make a plea to you and any of my other commenters – please keep any feuds you have with friends off my blog. Even if it’s just a little innocuous(?) comment before you get the main ball rolling. I’ve seen some of these blogs and the comments - the infighting just makes me want to throw up.
If I have to get you and Mikey over here for scotch until you both hug and make up then so be it. Just give me a date.
If not, you two can keep at it..but please, not here, mf. Thank you. This is the last thing i'll say on this topic on this blog.

Now, I have to admit first and foremost my knowledge of the tax structures involving churches and arts organizations are almost null. So thanks for setting me straight on that.
The main difference I see in the Arts and Religion is this…
Art celebrates humanity. It celebrates creativity and new ideas. It evolves and makes people think. And it’s all made by humans. (for humans). And, like Religion, art compels us to have an opinion.
Ahhhh, opinions.
So now in the words of the comedian Brian Regan..”I hate to step on anybodies beliefs but, ….well….let’s get started….”
In my OPINION religion is dreck.
In my OPINION religion, through fear, makes people act good. (this isn’t on the face of it such a bad thing….way to go Religion!)
In my OPINION religions by their very nature, are full of false truths.
(No film festival director ever told me one of their judges was a big guy up in the sky. Who by the way, was also my creator and would have the final decision on where I would go when I die.)
In my OPINION anyone who tells you what happens to you when you die (and religions do this) is Full Of Shit. And because of this, when reasonable, intelligent people defend the church and its doctrines, it pisses me off. And makes me sad for the planet.
I also know firsthand - it “just feels better” to believe in God. It does. But my brain is a persnickety thing. And when all the information gets filtered through – it shakes it’s head and says “No. NO! Enough!” Saying NO to religion is a tough thing after years of being knocked upside the head by it. It’s not for the weak of will.
It’s easier to suck on the tit of religion than it is to think for yourself.
In my OPINION religion deserves to get punched in the face once in awhile, metaphorically or not.
In my OPINION religion, unlike art, disrespects humanity by continuing to patronize it.
So yeah, there’s that.
And, In my OPINION I’m 100% correct in these beliefs! How cool is THAT?!

Put your faith in the human race.
It's a tough switch but
you'll be happy you did.

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Today's Scores

Cubs 4
Twins 2

Ernie Kovacs 13
Stan Brakhage 1

West Aurora 3
Totie Fields 8

Lew Alcindor 5
Ornithology 1

Asians 4
Cleavon Little 8

Alexander Calder 10
mustard 2

The Spanish Inquisition 13
sporks 9

Steven Wright 11
Tuesday 5

sprocketholes 7
John Cage 8

Jerry Garcia 2
Bjorn Borg 1

Big Macs 3
pointillism 2

The Eighteenth Hole at Pebble Beach 5
Todd Farwell 9

God 2
Verbs 3

E pluribus unum 5
Youtube 1

wallpaper removal 17
Tucumcari, New Mexico 6

Professor Irwin Corey 11
your middle name 3

film 16
1963 4

what happens when you die 11
Arkansas Razorbacks 2

Elgin, Illinois 15
fake poop 6

prayer 7
Christopher Walken's dentist 3

Napoleon 9
Pia Zadora 7

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82 Words for Splank

The eskimo language Yupik has been estimated to have approximately 24 words for snow. In keeping with this theory my apartment has 82 words or phrases for "a fucking mess". It started when i came up with the phrase for the grizzled charred pizza strands hanging from the grill inside my oven.
Pizza Scoundrels.
After coming up with this i started looking around my apartment..
Piles of stuff in corners, unfinished sculptures, stacks of crazed semi ideas, forgotten projects, it all added up. Here then is the list of small and glorious sections of disarray at TeamMiller Headquarters:

Creeping Nitch, Chelm, Art Phlegm, Whispering Squelch, Y'melmahay, Corner Thingees, Disinterpreted Norp,Resting Urk, Table of Contents, Silent Gargle, Dwellers, Interfangle, Unfinished Nerbs,Discarded Funk, Frutz, Mess Throng,
Skrulk, Big Bang, Junk Attack,Yesterdays Explosion, Balancing Frax, Murder One, Mini Scrutz, Fuckit, a Pile of Fuckit, a Lingering Pile of Fuckit, Yobobo, Curbsters/Curblings, Past History,Incarcerated Wingdings, Talminkle,
a Pile of Brakhage, Headache, Disproportionate Flink, Art Spasm, Falling Backwash,
Stacked Frangles, Leaning Twilch,Wasted Idea, Sprawling Nooch,Sculpture Burp, a Roomful of Me,
Sri Larry,Filthco, Window Squelch,Once Proud, Sliders,
Scattered Change,Trigger Happy, Meandering Filth,Cornered Fernlings, Idea Pile,Tow Jam, Hangdog Sink, the Unforgiven, Grandfathers, Latners, Scattered Froop, Kranch, Truncated Nurt, Rectangular Gruttz,Dirty Melvit, Fart Collage,Diagonal Tharch, Wandering Blutz, So Yesterday, Chankle, Standing Felch, NoOne’s Lark,
Fixated Whereabouts, Yummsters,Pile o' Shame, Frantic Laziness, Salt Lick,
Tripping Little Epiphanies, Ancient Grease, Concentrated Miller,Splank, Not Exactly Hallmark, Forgotten Schmutz, Leaning Beige,
Wall Twirch & Floor Splat.

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random entries from the current journal (Miscellaneous Various)

It's come to this . . .Corporations selling us minutes. cc captioning mistypings on tv tonight:mod rat republicans. Look at you! livin' in your white castle. In The Band Or Not In The Band? take a photo of a local band with two other people in the shot..all album covery looking. viewers job to decide . .. who is or is not in the band. Ben Gazzara the 69 Mets Man Ray. The thing about autobiographies is you can only do it on one person. a cinema on the spot...little or no graphics...probably a bad name for your graphics firm ..when your receptionist answers the phone "Little or No Graphics. How may i direct your call? " To Catch a Predator - ..these sad, F-ed up men and their lives crumbling apart in someone's kitchen. like watching a car wreck. that rabbi the best so far for my money. watching people plead...i dunno picking the right religion .. they make it all important..it's just a crapshoot..where you are born. Church of God the Verb. Think. all the religions say they are The One. if that's so then all the rest are null and void regarding the afterlife. (talk about positive spin...reruns now an "encore presentation" and death is "afterlife") God is hope repackaged. Now that we know this . .Let's just bring back hope! favorite quote from the bible to use against them : "The truth will set you free". SockRay Blue!! Shawn tonight . . . a few too many cocktails gave him a headful of thunder. words are just agreed upon. Don't Fuck with Wendy Testaburger! when your eyes are shut, you can see to infinity . Earth: Making It Up As We Go Along. each finished film is ultimately the answer. when you started it was still just a question - to play with and take on down a path of your own choosing. character name: Tao Jones. Go with God..... Just go! The Fag That Broke the Camels Back. Consciousness: the continuous situation. When your planet gets filled with martyrs . .it doesn't bode well. character in film: Rapper who has a panda bear named Bling Bling. good comedy club name: Hilarity & Sue's. No boogieman is an island.character in the story goes into a store to buy some context. good documentary idea . . .The History of Tomorrow. It's actually pretty wonderful that the universe always remains this constant mystery . .keeps us forever curious.

On Vacation

2009-03-21T23:26:00.006-05:00

Am off to the island of Hawaii for a week with old high school friends.
See you in a week. Or so.

51 seconds of mini pong (in 3 parts)

2009-03-16T12:07:00.007-05:00

Now that Spring has sprung (at least for today) we can get outside again without freezing our asses off. But during the Winter here in Minneapolis we are used to getting our exercise indoors. here's some footage taken at a friends house of us playing mini pong. (On a side note this is a great game to work on your tennis skills...i played doubles (indoors, of course) awhile back after playing a bunch of mini pong and my net game was AwesomE that day.
And I'm posting this because nobody "got" my oxymoronic film to the extent I intended except me. (Note to Self: Don't post videos while on Vitamin M)

Oxymoronic

2009-03-11T14:17:00.004-05:00

I just found out this afternoon I won third place honorable mention for shortest film at the Oxymoronic Made Up Film & Video Festival in Millford, Connecticut.
Really. Trust me.

Today is spraypainted film day

2009-03-05T15:29:00.004-06:00

Spraypainting and sprocketholes seems to be the order of the day here (of the month?)
now i'm spraying actual strips of 35mm film. always back to film it seems. although those canvas works look good (and big) these ain't too bad either. you might have to click on these to see any kind of details. dunno where these are headed but it's a direction nonetheless. The longest journey begins with a single step or something like that, right?

old post never published . . .

2009-02-25T16:26:00.007-06:00

til now! (for good reason? i dunno gimme a break.)

when writing a today's scores post i had one that goes like this:

drawing outside the line 137
cue cards 2
this is the story of my life so far....need to even that score out more - might be more productive.
and narrative, for sure.
time will tell.

Hold Your Horses!

Sunrise lighting . .depends which way you point your lens..east or west. the west glows. the east is contrasty.

Good question for the 1970's game show, MatchGame . . .
"What would Jesus Blank?"

Astonomers, scientists, philosophers and physicists all getting together for a thinktank - after many months their paper comes out and states that the universe is almost definitely something.
After some arguments, they change this to almost certainly something.

to create a new genre of film simply look over the application form for any film festival. online applications make you click on such words as :
Experimental
Narrative
Subtitled
Black & White

make films where these aren't yes or no questions. it's a start.

Rejected working title for Our Bodies, Ourselves:

Ladies and Germs

If you attempt to reach higher
you already have.

new word for something that starts out very cool but then goes sour ~
Betty's new business was a huge success,
but then it sundanced.

Look for it all in his new book, Melancholy Olives! coming out this Fall!!

Stencils, Spraypaint & Sprocketholes

2009-02-18T15:58:00.012-06:00

Have been spraypainting onto canvas the past couple weeks. Ed Lentsch was kind enough to give me some of his canvas scraps which happen to be the perfect size/dimensions for rendering some strips of film. Long and narrow. So I've been spraying a bunch (and breathing in a bit too, unfortunately). But I've got a few tests around here that are looking OK or so I think..

here's one (5 1/4" X 20") on canvas, stretched.
And yes, I am a Moon Child. I know, I know, not as cool as Aries but we Cancers try harder.

slapped together

2009-02-09T15:16:00.007-06:00

This is slapped together and i make no apologies. i had some backgrounds layered and i put some titles in there. near the end one of my mattes went south - instead of 'fixing' it i just put another sound over the top of it. make it seem like it was planned. or something. boy this looks like hell online. the things that PoP! on my screen now just coalesce into a gravy of pseudo-prime colors. damn. Oh and thanks to Beethoven.

what i bought on ebay

2009-02-06T10:19:00.005-06:00

(and why you should care)

OK I lied, the only reason I'm posting about this is so my farticle post won't be the first thing a person sees when they come to this blog. AND maybe, sorta because am thinking about starting a new subject for the future called "the photography of ebay"
for instance - nothing quite says Bach like an in ground pool backdrop.
Either way I got a new projector to pick up this weekend (it's local - i saved shipping)
and now my farticle post is further down the page where it belongs.

Who do you think you are?

2009-02-05T20:10:00.003-06:00

Farticle

2009-02-05T01:19:00.004-06:00

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http://online.w
sj.com%2Farticle%2FSB121460099221711769.html.

Somebody recently sent me a link to an article and although i was unable to open it I noticed in the address very plainly in the middle there is the word farticle.

What exactly IS a farticle?
well this brings to mind a story from my past where Mark Petterson was more than a little miffed one day at having to smell his older brothers farts . . .his brother 's response? "If you're smelling it then some of my fart is IN YOUR NOSE right now." Hmmm. Of course, this brings up questions regarding physiology, olfactory senses and brotherhood for sure.

So yeah . .a farticle then is that small area of your fart that resides in someone else's nose.
There you have it! So who said Seemless Universe was nothing more than the meandering thoughts of an underemployed man? Who ?!! Who said that??!!
It's fucking Educational! or F'educational.

Now sure some of you are reading this and thinking . .THIS isn't why i visit this site, damn Miller.
oh well. come back again soon and we'll demonstrate how to send e-farticles.
The technology is almost there.

Peace, Love and Sheesh,
Miller

random journal entries

2009-01-30T12:15:00.024-06:00

Faith in the Future

Dr. Reginald Fankfinder

Through the rain, the moon waned.

the newest anti depressant - Oblivium

I,
like many before me,
have licked from the bowl of love.

The short list of characters in the film:
Enrique Persisto

Lady Cummings

Chaz Memento

Glib Meevers

Wilvelma Serene

Jack Matters

Harvey "Spittoon" Smith

Sandy Apple

Big Dick Cox

Regina Magellan

Danforth Brandle

Falling under the spell of significance

Christianity is based on a certain draining of the human spirit -
a unique kind of shame.

DICK CHENEY BEFORE HE DICKS YOU

reality show that never took off - Valedictorian Island

I think i could enjoy life more
if it wasn't so damn persistent.

Chance, SuperChance & Coincidence

The menstruation cycle of the panda
is a topic that doesn't come up so much, I've learned.

Vague Rules!

Pilltopia

Jesus & Soupy:
A cross cultural study

This Life,
This Mystery

LISTENING TO TRAFFIC IS MORE ENJOYABLE
WHEN IT'S THE BAND.

Church Of The Holy Insignificance...

but in this realization
as in
the phrase
"if everything is an emergency
than nothing is an emergency"
THEN
if everything is insignificant than nothing is insignificant.

some days you just feel like a Total Diptych

Carrying on is a thing a person can do.

The play was blown dead.

Traveling in Place:
Journals From a Mind

Christianity - Nestled in goodness since before you were born!
This myth of a judgemental God - most intelligent people grow out of it but since it's couched in "goodness" and "niceness" - lots of people hold on tight.

Kazoo is a verb, too.

SHAVE THE WHALE

Prop Letters (Example LITB #27)

2009-01-26T09:27:00.006-06:00

I found something online recently thats kinda funny and fits into the whole seemless universe mindset (if there is one). You may have seen some vintage photographs up on the top of the blog here in the past. I've been getting these from a great site called Shorpy.
Anyway this photo was submitted by "Dave" on the Shorpy site.. It's a shot from an episode of "Leave it to Beaver". It's pretty self explanatory.

Mr. Ward Cleaver
485 Mapleton Drive
Mayfield, State

My Dear Mr. Cleaver:

This paragraph has absolutely nothing to do with anything.
It is here merely to fill up space. Still, it is words,
rather than repeated letters, since the latter might not
give the proper appearance, namely, that of an actual note.

For that matter, all of this is nonsense, and the only
part of this that is to be read is the last paragraph,
which part is the inspired creation of the producers of
this very fine series.

Another paragraph of stuff. Now is the time for all good
men to come to the aid of their party. The quick brown
fox jumped over the lazy dog. My typing is lousy, but the
typewriter isn’t so hot either. After all, why should I
take the blame for these mechanical imperfections, with
which all of us must contend. Lew Burdette just hit a
home run and Milwaukee leads seven to one in the series.
This is the last line of the filler material of the note.
No, my mistake, that was only the next to last. This is last.

I hope you can find a suitable explanation for Theodore’s
unusual conduct.

Yours truly,

Cornelia Rayburn

This guy "Dave" even went so far as to date the letter October 2, 1958 as that was the day Lew Burdette homered in the World Series between the Yankees and the Braves - one month before this episode aired.

Books & Exactos

2009-01-22T23:04:00.012-06:00

Have been cutting into the old books tonight - these hardback covers make nice canvaseses!

Got a bunch of 'em over here but have just scanned this trio. Dunno why i got into the night sky mode but what the hell.

1.20.09 - Hail To The New Guy

2009-01-20T13:39:00.004-06:00